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Post by Maxamillion Kitanius IV on Mar 2, 2016 0:48:26 GMT
Maxamillion would be sitting there. On the ground as night wore on he would let out a sigh. 400 years. 400 years of sitting on the ground being carried away by floods, rain, rodents, and birds, FUCKING BIRDS, and still no one had picked him up. That's fine, fuck them, fuck them hard, sideways, with a fucking rusty lead pipe!!! But he's ok, he's ooooooookay.
As he was sitting there shooting the shit there would be a tremble in the ground. Footsteps, someone was coming. Who cares. As soon as he saw the man he couldn't help but call out.
"Fuck you, you two legged freak. That's right keep hobbling on with your miserable fucking life you stupid giant piece of shitty lard!"
If this guy was like everyone else he would just pass on without hearing a word. Oh well at least he got to have fun yelling at people.
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Post by Jude Sinclare on Mar 2, 2016 2:31:04 GMT
"The fuck?" The one eyed Ravnos would turn toward the stone. "The fuck is your problem?" He asked the stone... 'Fuck, I'm talking to a rock... Trix will love this.' He thought to himself as he lifted the rock off the ground.
"Dude, what the fuck did Trix give me?" He asked tossing the rock up and down in his palm. Tonight was fucking weird. "Calm your red ass down, alright? I'm probably way to high for this..." He turned carrying the rock with him inside.
"Trix! What am I on and why is this rock swearing at me?" He called having absolutely no idea what the fuck was going on.
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Post by Maxamillion Kitanius IV on Mar 2, 2016 2:39:07 GMT
As soon as Jude picked up the stone it would glow a bright red and a deep booming voice would come from the stone.
"Thou hast picked up a stone of power. Thine life force has now been fused with this stone. It will no protect you from all harm upon thine request. But beware once used this stone will sease to exist! Use at your own peril..."
Then the stone would stop glowing and go silent.
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Trixie Warden
Neonate
"Sometimes I think I came out me mum the wrong way."
Posts: 62 
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Post by Trixie Warden on Mar 2, 2016 3:21:42 GMT
She popped her head out the back door in a flurry of brunette hair, looking confused. Or as confused as a stoned girl could look. She tilted her head to one side, looking him over thoughtfully.
"What, babe?" She cooed. "You're not... on anything hallucinatory. Like. Nothing. Why?"
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Post by Jude Sinclare on Mar 2, 2016 5:01:17 GMT
Jude held up the rock for her. "This fucking thing, told me it's the god damn ring of power." He claimed holding up the fucking asshole rock. He walked inside and wrapped his arms around her. "I'm not crazy right?" He asked her, his voice muffled against her shoulder.
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Post by Maxamillion Kitanius IV on Mar 2, 2016 5:48:16 GMT
"I'm a stone of power you fucking jackass! And yeah I would say you are nucking futs, you stupid worthless piece of shitty existence!"
The rock would just dangle there, in Jude's hand. Waiting for the idiot to realize what he was holding.
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Post by Jude Sinclare on Mar 2, 2016 11:27:01 GMT
"Listen you hunk of fuckin rock, if you don't chill out, I'ma put you in a box somewhere and conveniently forget where it's at!" He turned to Trix, his frustration obvious. "The rock is talking right?" He asked, obvious fear in his eye.
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Post by Maxamillion Kitanius IV on Mar 2, 2016 15:01:57 GMT
"No, you listen here, you two legged giant freakozoid! I. Am. A. Stone. Not some rigged ass rock. Learn the difference you half crazed too fucked stupid ass."
The stone was pissed.
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Trixie Warden
Neonate
"Sometimes I think I came out me mum the wrong way."
Posts: 62
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Post by Trixie Warden on Mar 2, 2016 15:05:04 GMT
She blinked, staring at Jude and the rock. "I mean... you are crazy? But not because of the rock."
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Post by Jude Sinclare on Mar 2, 2016 15:10:47 GMT
Jude looked to Trix for a second blankly, his eye looking every bit as confused and angry as he was. Well, anger was something he could use. And he did. At a rock. "Fuck you you fucking fuck, you're a god damn rock, and fuck. Why am I even arguing with you? You aren't a real person, you're a hunk of earth. FUCK!"
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Trixie Warden
Neonate
"Sometimes I think I came out me mum the wrong way."
Posts: 62
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Post by Trixie Warden on Mar 2, 2016 15:22:19 GMT
She stumbled out of the door, trying to get to her boyfriend's side. Her eyes were as wide as dinner plates, pupils dilated, but her hair was properly brushed around her face. She placed a delicate hand upon his shoulder and leaned into his back, peering around his arm to get a better look at the talking stone.
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Post by Maxamillion Kitanius IV on Mar 2, 2016 15:53:36 GMT
"Youee the fucking fuck you fuck! Do you see my round ass? That's cause I'm a stone you cheap ass piece of shit!"
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Post by Jude Sinclare on Mar 2, 2016 16:43:42 GMT
Jude leaned back into Trix just looking at the stone for a moment. "We got a nice place to put this thing so we can hear it babe?" He asked, taking comfort in her constant presence.
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Trixie Warden
Neonate
"Sometimes I think I came out me mum the wrong way."
Posts: 62
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Post by Trixie Warden on Mar 2, 2016 16:45:56 GMT
"Oh wow. It actually does talk."
Trix's eyes widened and she leaned forward to lightly drag her finger along the stone, curiosity driving her like a child. She hadn't a clue what might come of the simple action, but she was far too curious to care, at that point.
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Post by Maxamillion Kitanius IV on Mar 2, 2016 17:45:07 GMT
"There we go. That's better we are now becoming reasonable little junkies."
The stone would moan when Trixie touched it.
"Ooooohh... Yeah that's the spot baby! Hey fuck tard I like this chick. Yo babe when this dumb shit isn't doing enough to pleasure you just let me know and I'll show you the true meaning of getting stoned!"
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